“I want her back but how do I get her back after the breakup?” This is probably what’s going on in your mind when you realized that you still love your ex girlfriend.
It’s true that breakups are hard and if you keep telling yourself “I want her back,” then you need to show her that you’ve changed. Or at least, you’ve changed your bad habits and improved yourself just for her.
How do you prove to her that you’ve changed and made improvements?
1. Try changing your attitude towards her
Instead of treating her as someone you just need to get back, it’s better if you treat her as someone who wants to be loved and feel special. What can you offer her that no other man can? Since you know your ex, it will give you an advantage over the other men. You already know the things she likes and doesn’t like so use this knowledge to your advantage.
2. Prove to yourself that you’ve changed
You have to convince yourself that you have changed before you can prove it to her. If you are uncertain or not sincere about making self improvements then she will see right through you. In other words, you need to take time to develop the new and improved you. Take time to heal then find out what triggers negative reactions such as anger, lying, jealousy, etc.
3. Don’t rush the changes
Making self-improvements doesn’t happen overnight. You can’t just let a day go by then try to convince her that you’ve changed for the better. It’s going to take a lot more than that to convince her. Be patient and give yourself time to make the improvements you need to do.
4. Actions speak louder than words
It’s essential that your actions match up with the things you say you will do. If you’re trying to not be controlling, then don’t go telling your ex that she’s not allowed to see that man. If she’s in a rebound relationship because she finds it hard to get over you, then let her be for now. She needs to see your efforts in order to come back to you and you won’t succeed if you keep coming back to your old habits.
5. Create agreements with your ex
It’s not easy hearing your bad habits from someone else but it has to be done if you want to make improvements. You need to be honest with yourself and accept your mistakes. Let her know that you’re taking her complaints seriously and don’t snap at her when she’s telling you what you’re doing wrong.
6. Let her notice it
Rather than constantly telling her that you’ve changed, it’s best if she notices it. Seeing subtle changes like being less controlling, being able to control your temper more, and even improvements in your communication skills are a plus. She will see these as genuine efforts and she’ll be happy for you.
If you’re telling yourself “I want her back,” then be sure that you are prepared to make the necessary changes. You don’t have to change who you are completely. She fell in love with you which means that she loves your good qualities. It’s the bad habits you need to get rid of so work on it.